Jock-sniffing

With Derek Jeter's new cologne, "Driven" ("reflecting the unique personality of one of the most driven men in America") set to hit stores in November, we here at No Mas began envisioning the procession of athlete scents that are sure to follow. For instance:

Ryan Leaf's "AnalChug," reflecting the nutty aroma of abject failure that can be smelled in a cup of Busch beer after it has been dribbled over Leaf's anus.

Big Papi's "Walkoff," reflecting the singular fragrance of a scorched baseball after it has had the shit completely knocked out of it and landed in the center field bleachers for the umpteenth time.

Alex Rodriguez's "Crotch," reflecting the unique scent of ARod's crotch, which according to him smells like daffodils.

Jim Brown's "Smell" - reflecting the smell of something you better like or else get knocked the fuck out sucka.

Floyd Landis's "P," reflecting the on-the-go lifestyle of the unique man who wants to smell like tainted piss.

Tom Brady's "Handsome," reflecting what handsomeness smells like.

Doug Christie's "My Wife's Hair" - reflecting the ambrosial waft of Doug Christie's wife's hair, the smell that exudes from the clouds in heaven.

Arturo Gatti's "Baldomir's Right Glove," reflecting a very special leathery scent taken directly from the face of Arturo himself.