Pretty Boy Floyd the Outlaw

Well gather round me children
There’s a story I must tell
About Pretty Boy Floyd the outlaw
All of France knows him well.

It was in the town of Paree
A Sunday afternoon,
All the world beside him on his cycle
As into town he rode.

There a deputy sheriff approached him
With a bottle rather rude,
Said “this, your piss, is tainted”
And soon the whole world knew.

Pretty Boy said that’s just piss
And sometimes I drink too much;
Makes my pee all watery
And seem tainted just a touch.

But the sheriff had another bottle
A B sample known about,
And this one proved the point he said
Beyond a reasonable doubt.

Now Floyd's bound for the trees and the timber
To live a life of shame;
A cheater, a liar, a true pariah,
An embarrassment to his name.