Oh Yoko

The Great One got hitched 18 years ago today, July 16, 1988. He married Janet Jones in Canada's first and only royal wedding. Prior to Gretzky, Jones had spread herself a little thin across the sporting and entertainment b-list, dating Bruce Willis (he was a b-lister back then) and being engaged for a while to Vitas Gerulaitis.

Gretsky first met Jones when he was a judge on Dance Fever in 1984 (think about that for a second), but evidently he couldn't pry her hands off Denny Terrio's ass long enough to chat her up. The romance didn't start until 1987, when they met again at a Lakers game. The Great One later told Howard Stern on the air that he banged her that night. Scored a goal and two assists. Classy.

The wedding was some opulent celebrity bullshit (click here for the CBC footage) broadcast live on Canadian television and attended by the hockey a-list (Gordie Howe) and the Hollywood f-list (Alan Thicke). Canada's love affair with Miss Jones turned to blind hatred in less than a month, however, as Gretzky was dealt to the Kings three weeks later and the nation blamed the ambitions of his "actress" wife for forcing the move to L.A. As far as I can tell, though Canadians have long forgiven Gretzky's treason, Jones is forever Yoko Ono to our brethren in the Great White North.

Of course, it doesn't help matters that she turned out to be a drooling, goggle-eyed, degenerate gambling addict now does it?