This fucker is your next heavyweight champion

Ladies and gentleman, I bring you Oleg Maskaev. 37-year-old Kazakhstani by way of Staten Island. Victim of Corrie Sanders. Couldn't make it past the second against Lazy Lance Whitaker. And now... the WBC HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WORLD.

I mean, where the fuck is David Tua when you need him. I guess it's up to Calvin Brock now. Calvin Brock? Paging Calvin Brock? Yo holms, work this thing out for us would you please? This shit has gotten ridiculous.